Live the Dream Read online

  Contents

  Cover

  A Selection of Recent Titles by Claire Lorrimer from Severn House

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  Acknowledgements

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-one

  Chapter Twenty-two

  Chapter Twenty-three

  A Selection of Recent Titles by Claire Lorrimer from Severn House

  NEVER SAY GOODBYE

  THE SEARCH FOR LOVE

  FOR ALWAYS

  THE FAITHFUL HEART

  DECEPTION

  OVER MY DEAD BODY

  TROUBLED WATERS

  INFATUATION

  TRUTH TO TELL

  DEAD RECKONING

  OBSESSION

  TRUST ME

  LIVE THE DREAM

  LIVE THE DREAM

  Claire Lorrimer

  This ebook is copyright material and must not be copied, reproduced, transferred, distributed, leased, licensed or publicly performed or used in any way except as specifically permitted in writing by the publishers, as allowed under the terms and conditions under which it was purchased or as strictly permitted by applicable copyright law. Any unauthorised distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author’s and publisher’s rights and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly.

  First published in Great Britain and the USA 2016 by

  SEVERN HOUSE PUBLISHERS LTD of

  19 Cedar Road, Sutton, Surrey, England, SM2 5DA.

  This eBook edition first published in 2016 by Severn House Digital

  an imprint of Severn House Publishers Limited

  Trade paperback edition first published

  in Great Britain and the USA 2016 by

  SEVERN HOUSE PUBLISHERS LTD

  Copyright © 2016 by Claire Lorrimer.

  The right of Claire Lorrimer to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs & Patents Act 1988.

  British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data

  A CIP catalogue record for this title is available from the British Library.

  ISBN-13: 978-0-7278-8637-8 (cased)

  ISBN-13: 978-1-84751-736-4 (trade paper)

  ISBN-13: 978-1-78010-800-1 (e-book)

  Except where actual historical events and characters are being described for the storyline of this novel, all situations in this publication are fictitious and any resemblance to living persons is purely coincidental.

  This ebook produced by

  Palimpsest Book Production Limited,

  Falkirk, Stirlingshire, Scotland

  For my darling sister, Anne,

  with whom I have shared so many happy times, with love

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  I wish to thank Paul Ovstedal and his mother, the late author Rosalind Laker, for their assistance with information about World War II Norway. I would also like to thank Martin Johnsen for his advice and assistance and, not least, the team at Severn House, for their continuing interest in my wartime stories.

  ONE

  August, 1939

  ‘War imminent stop You are to return home train leaving Munich 13.00 hours tomorrow stop Telegraph receipt of this instruction stop Father.’

  The young Norwegian student, Kristoffer Holberg, handed the telegram back to the girl lying beside him in the long grass bordering the Lake Tegernsee where they had decided to picnic. The expression on his good-looking face was as downcast as hers.

  ‘My sister says we’ll just ignore it, the way we did last time when Father panicked, thinking there would be a war when Germany marched into Austria. We were going on one of our weekend skiing trips to Garmisch and we pretended we didn’t get the telegram until we returned, by which time everyone knew the Austrians had welcomed them. Una says our Prime Minister is arranging a peace treaty with Herr Hitler right now.’

  Kristoffer’s face was momentarily distorted by a frown. ‘I wasn’t going to tell you but my father has written saying I should cut short my college course and return home.’ He paused, his blue eyes thoughtful before adding: ‘Being an MP, your father might have some inside knowledge about the political situation,’ he said. ‘Oh, Dil, darling Dil, I couldn’t bear it if you had to go home.’

  Tears filled Dilys’ eyes as she contemplated the prospect of being parted from the young fellow student with whom she had fallen in love. Their developing relationship was not proving to be just a casual affair such as Dilys’ twin, Una, was enjoying. Kristoffer, too, was serious: he talked of getting engaged when Dilys was old enough. At seventeen, she had not long ago left her girls’ boarding school. She’d been allowed to further her education in Munich, where she and her twin boarded with a retired professor and his wife from whom they learned colloquial German and went to classes at college with all the young students from many other parts of the world. It was an idyllic, carefree life as groups of mixed nationalities went off together skiing in the winter months, bunking in mountain huts, having sing-songs to someone’s mouth organ or accordion in the evenings. In summer they went on excursions, skated at night on the city ice rink, got cheap tickets for the events in the big operahaus and went to fancy dress and other parties.

  The fact that there were such large numbers of uniformed men on the streets did not particularly concern them, for they were all polite and friendly to foreigners. They had heard stories of ill treatment, even of the deportation of Jewish people, but had not personally witnessed any atrocities. As far as they were concerned, the atmosphere in this beautiful city was entirely joyful, the students only interested in their personal pleasures.

  As for Dilys and Kristoffer, from the day they had first met on the ski slopes when she had bumped into him and knocked him over, they had had no interest in anyone else. It was truly love at first sight, as she’d confessed to her twin.

  There had been kisses and passionate embraces but they had never gone ‘all the way’ – a euphemism they employed at school for the kind of lovemaking that produced babies. Only those with brothers had even the vaguest idea of what this entailed. Such was their innocence that most were agreed babies went into and out of their mothers’ stomachs via their belly buttons.

  Kristoffer was aware of Dilys’ innocence and had always controlled the passionate love he felt for her. Now, the prospect of their imminent parting became unbearable.

  Alone in the field with the remains of their picnic lunch scattered around them, not only he but Dilys, too, was unable to think of anything but the agony of parting: of the prospect of not being able to see each other every day as happened now. Each morning when she ran downstairs to the hallway of the pension, she knew Kristoffer would be waiting for her outside the big house belonging to Professor Von Zwehl and his wife, who provided care, lodging and tutorials for them.

  ‘I love you, Kris!’ she now told him between his desperate kisses. His hands tightened round her and he pressed his body closer still to hers. There was no sign of any other people in the deserted spot Kristoffer had chosen for their picnic, and Dilys now made no objection when he lifted her blouse and, bending his head, kissed her breasts.

&nbs
p; Unashamedly, she pressed herself even closer against him. ‘Kristoffer, I want you to do it. I want you to make love to me. I want to belong to you in every possible way. Please, I know we shouldn’t, but if I do have to go home at least I shall feel that we really do belong to each other …’

  She broke off as she saw the hesitation in his eyes. He knew she was innocent and that there could be risks but he would be careful. He, too, wanted to cement their relationship, to make her his own.

  He could feel her heart beating fiercely against his chest and, with all restraint gone, he quickly undressed her, his hands moving from her breasts down to her hips. It was Dilys who now struggled out of her skirt and helped him to remove her cotton knickers. Instinctively, her legs parted. Kristoffer had quickly pulled off his shorts and within seconds he was lying between her legs, his voice husky with desire as he kissed her gently and whispered: ‘I shall try not to hurt you.’

  Dilys was unsure what he meant, but whatever it was she didn’t care. Uncertain though she was as to what would now happen, she never wavered in her decision to let him make love to her.

  Kristoffer was as gentle as he could be, doing his utmost to curb the fierceness of his desire as he eased his way into her. She gave a small cry as he overcame her virginity and then, unable to control himself any longer, he allowed himself to move passionately inside her.

  Despite the moment of pain and the strangeness of what had just happened, Dilys felt a great surge of joy at this astonishing but wonderful union of their bodies. And, reaching up, she pulled his head down to her and kissed him again, this time with a rush of tenderness.

  Kristoffer’s arm tightened around her. Very gently, he stroked the shining waves of hair he called the colour of burnished bronze from her forehead and said, ‘You are so beautiful. I love you; I’ll always love you.’

  For several minutes they lay entwined and then Kristoffer slowly eased himself into a sitting position. The hot sun of the late afternoon was burning down upon them and both were damp with perspiration. A smile crossed his face as he shrugged off his shirt and said, ‘I know, Dil, we’ll cool off. Have a swim in the lake. There’s no one around to see us.’

  Returning his smile, Dilys stood up and shyly allowed him to take her hand. Together they ran down the glassy slope into the cold waters of the lake.

  It was too cold to stay there for long but, refreshed, they ran hand in hand back to their picnic place, pulled on their clothes and sat with their arms around each other. There was a moment when Dilys knew that as yet in her life she had never felt happier than she did at this moment.

  Almost reading her thoughts, Kristoffer said, ‘I’ll never forget this day. The day I made you mine.’

  Momentarily the cloud crossed the sun and, as the shadow fell across them, Dilys was unhappily reminded of the time. ‘It’s nearly six o’clock, Kristoffer. We’ll have to go back. I’ll need to change for supper and one of the few times the professor is cross with us is if we are late for abendessen.’

  Aware they would not be seeing each other again until the following afternoon, they were silent as, holding tightly on to each other, they walked back to the pension. Stealing one last long kiss, Dilys tore herself away from his embrace and hurried indoors.

  Una was already upstairs getting changed when, her cheeks flushed, Dilys hurried into their bedroom. Knowing her twin almost as well as she knew herself, Una knew from one look at Dilys’ face that something special had happened to her. There was a glow, a far-away expression in her eyes which made her ask impulsively, ‘Dil, you and Kristoffer … you didn’t go all the way, did you?’

  For a moment, Dilys did not reply, and Una’s thoughts turned to the two occasions when she herself had experienced this forbidden sexual activity, the first time being a hurried encounter with a French music student. He was almost as ignorant as she was and she had disliked the whole hurried procedure, which she had found both painful and embarrassing.

  Nor had she enjoyed her second experience, this time with an extremely good looking, popular pianist who played the piano and sang romantically at the tea dances to which she was regularly invited. She had been thrilled when he’d asked her to meet him once the tea dance was over. He took her to a bar where he sat beside her in a quiet, secluded corner and filled her head with compliments, keeping his body excitingly close to hers and her glass of wine full.

  Una had been kissed and fondled in the darkened room. It was a truly romantic evening, and when they left the bar in time for the professor’s eleven-thirty curfew, he’d said he would drive her back in his car to the pension where she lived.

  As Una’s companion had promised he would have her back in time, she made no objection when, on the way, he parked in a deserted cul-de-sac and started to kiss her. At first, while she was responding to his kisses and caresses, he was gentle but, quite suddenly, he had exposed himself and made no attempt to conceal what he was doing as he hurriedly pulled on protection.

  As embarrassed as she was shocked, Una had told him angrily that she wanted to go home immediately. At first he had laughed, telling her not to waste time teasing him; he’d had a long, tiring day and wanted to get home too. Una was now shocked as well as frightened, but her tears and protests had been ignored.

  That experience was such that she had decided then and there to avoid sex in future. Guessing Dilys had experimented with her Norwegian boy, she could not understand how she could look so radiant, so happy.

  Feeling that in some way, she herself was to blame for her unpleasant experiences, Una had decided not to confide in Dilys and to confine her light-hearted flirtations to the group of other young students she and Dilys mixed with during lectures.

  For the first time in their lives, Dilys did not want to share her thoughts and feelings with her twin. What had happened between her and Kristoffer was too special, too private, too personal for anyone’s knowledge than their own. Since their birth, she and Una had never been or wanted to be treated separately, or parted, even for an hour. As they had grown out of babyhood, Una had become the more dominant one, the leader, and Dilys her devoted shadow. It was only since they had come out to Germany to learn the language and Una had sometimes chosen to accept invitations from groups of young people that Dilys had preferred to go out alone with her good-looking Norwegian admirer.

  ‘Dil, you did, didn’t you?’ she repeated.

  ‘I don’t want to talk about it, Una!’ Dilys said. She added, with a note of defiance: ‘Kristoffer and I are going to get married – when I’m old enough. We’re sort of engaged and he gave me this ring and the chain so I can wear it round my neck. He guessed our parents would have a fit if they thought I’d agreed to marry him.’

  Una sighed. ‘We can but hope we’ll get away with it again. After all, it all seems so stupid. Heinz, my Luftwaffe pilot, says of course Germany doesn’t want to go to war with Britain, and if they do want to include Poland as part of the Reich there’s no reason why Britain should get involved. It’s really silly of Father to get such ideas! He should see how friendly everyone is. The German boys are just like us, even the ones in uniform. Last time we went home, Father was on about the black-shirted ones doing awful things to Jewish people but I told him this was nonsense because we’ve never seen anything like that here. I expect it’s because he’s a silly old MP!’

  Dilys refastened one of her silk stockings to her suspender belt and straightened her skirt. Bending down to put on her court shoes, she said thoughtfully, ‘Kristoffer said he thinks they do smash Jewish houses and steal from their shops but they make sure foreign students and foreigners don’t see what they are doing. He says maybe it is true because he once saw a jeweller’s shop with its windows smashed and the word Juden splashed across the door in white paint with a swastika in the middle.’

  Una sighed as she sat down at the dressing table and brushed her hair. ‘The trouble with our parents’ generation,’ she announced, ‘is that they are still fixated on the last war. Father say
s “there is no such thing as a good German”. I would just like him to meet Heinz, Wolfgang and Johann. I wonder that he ever let us come here! I suppose Mother persuaded him because she loved Dresden when she was there as a girl.’

  Their conversation was interrupted by a knock on the door and Frau Von Zwehl came in with a telegram in her hand. ‘Your father!’ she announced, handing it to Una. ‘He is arriving tomorrow morning and wishes you to be packed and ready to leave with him at midday.’ Her voice broke and she wiped her eyes with a handkerchief. ‘I am so sorry!’ she added. ‘You have been good guests.’

  After she had left the room, Una shrugged her shoulders and said, ‘That’s it, Dil! Home we have to go. What a bore! I was going to a fancy dress party tonight with Johann – I suppose I can’t go now.’

  Dilys was beyond words as, trembling, she sank down on to the bed, her face ashen as she realized her separation from Kristoffer would be so very soon.

  It was not until she was in bed later that night, listening to Una’s soft breathing as she slept, that she allowed herself to remember what had happened that afternoon.

  The next morning the twins took their usual places at the breakfast table and were enjoying the large cups of coffee brought in by the maid when they were aware of the front doorbell ringing. A moment later, there was the sound of the professor’s voice welcoming a visitor.

  ‘Dil, it’s Father,’ Una whispered. ‘He …’ She broke off as the portly figure of their father, preceded by the professor, came into the room.

  He looked down from one of his daughters to the other, his expression stern as he said, ‘When I received no reply to my telegram, and recalling last year when you chose to ignore my instructions, I have been obliged to cancel an important meeting and travel here in person to collect you. I trust you are both ready to leave?’

  Una blushed as she pulled back her chair and stood up. Her heart beating fast, she said, ‘Honestly, Father, Dil and I thought you were just in a flap like last year and you’d soon see there isn’t the slightest chance of us English people getting involved. All the Germans are very friendly and Dil and I—’